“Stop Thinking About What Could Have Been & Start Accepting What Is”
These words may seem cliche and honestly they are because whenever it comes to experiences that aren’t ideal for us, we are always told to follow this mantra. We try to incorporate these words in our daily lives but subconsciously we don’t always exercise this approach the right way.
We are emotional beings, so naturally we are going to go by what feels right. But don’t forget that your loved ones set the premise for why you feel the way that you do, so what they think is going to affect you regardless.
There are a few concepts that need to be understood here:
First, we need to realize how much power we have, and this is primarily shown when caring for others. I know it seems like a weird thing to say but when we care, we unknowingly give those we care about some of our power.
Well for starters, we worry about them, we value their opinion, and often times put them before us.
When they hurt, we hurt, when they are angry, we want to make sure that we can calm them down, whatever they are going through we want to be there for them. We make sure that we can do anything in our power to help them. By doing that we are surrendering energy that we can direct towards different aspects of our lives that need growth, but instead we choose to focus on them.
Think about it, we deliberately go out of our way to literally put ourselves through self sabotage for others who matter to us. My intent for this post was to not make you look at the relationships in your life and resent them, but to actually be thankful for them for making you the person you are today.
Secondly, to look at the relationships that don’t add value to who you are/ trying to become and regain the power that you gave to those relationships.
The price of selflessness is giving that power to those you care about for the expense of your own happiness.
This isn’t always the case, but it acts as an indicator for someone who isn’t worthy of your energy, or power. If someone is intentionally doing this to you and knows it, you need to muster up the strength and power you gave to them to take care of yourself.
You are the vessel that is bringing love and positivity into their life, so if their relation to you isn’t serving you anymore, you owe it to yourself and the ones who love YOU to let go. When we have exceeded our purpose in their life it’s time to move on to other things that we can contribute to.
The difference between people who we are meant to invest in, as opposed to those who are not is that with people that you know belong in your life, you understand that it is a continuous cycle of effort and commitment that regardless what it does to you in the moment; in the end their happiness is shared with you, and you can feel it.
Some people will take that light you shine on them and use that warmth for their own comfort, and that is when we need to take back that power we gave them in the first place. The ones that belong in our lives will not take that light from you, but instead borrow it when you offer it to them, and send it back your way when you need it more than they do.
Selflessness does not always have to come with a price
You aren’t just anybody
& regain your power.